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rambles
In other local and nonlocal news:
My mom is doing a lot better. The confusion she had three weeks ago seems to have been almost if not totally entirely due to the anesthesia working its way out of her system. My brother was there two weeks ago to get her moved out of the temporary convalescent place and make the arrangement to get her into the continuum-of-care place she'd chosen, and she moved into a "respite" apartment there in the middle of last week for a period of (I think) 30 days while she continues to recover from her surgery, acclimates to the new surroundings, etc., and then they'll reassess and presumably/hopefully agree to move her into an independent-living apartment where she won't be quite so hovered-over. :-P But her cognitive stuff is orders of magnitude better than it was in the few days following her surgery and frankly quite a lot better than it was the last few days before her surgery, so there's a chance we were right that getting her skull reattached will be good for her brain and I'm feeling a lot better about that in general.
Himself and I went to a friend's wedding last month, during which reception the bride came over to our table (as brides do) and said to me, very earnestly, something like "I know it's just my own paranoia, but I'm always afraid I've done something to disappoint you, and ever since Himself introduced you to us I've just thought oh my god she is so cool and I just want her to like me, what if she doesn't like me?" I ... admit I was totally baffled and asked her if she'd been drinking. (I was being serious. She said "Oh, clearly," which I took at face value until she reminded me that she doesn't drink, so she was being serious and sober with all this Fox-is-so-cool-I-badly-need-her-to-like-me stuff.) I mean. What do you say when a person who is way, way cooler and better-looking than you are says such a thing at her own wedding? I don't actually remember what I did say, but eventually off she went to another table, and another guest at our table said something about what all that shows about Bride's character, and I said of course it's very nice of Bride to say all that stuff to me - I'm flattered and undeserving at best, and the guest said see and she thought that there showed something about my character. The whole business was very left-field and discomfiting,
and I mention it because yesterday at work my boss (who is an old friend from college) showed me a picture on his phone of himself with someone I knew casually in college but haven't seen or heard from since, and I said Oh, nice picture, and he said "And he remembers you very fondly and favorably as being someone he totally admired and thought was a complete badass." Oh my god you still know Fox, this dude seems to have said to my old-friend-who-is-now-also-my-boss. Put me back in touch with her, he seems to have said. ("We're friends on Facebook," bossfriend said, "so you can find her yourself easily.")
So - twice in four weeks, people much cooler than myself have raved at or about me in ways that I have no real choice but to believe have been sincere? And I don't know what to do with that. Probably nothing, really, except go on about my life as normal, but maybe also wonder a little bit where the hell they were 25 years ago when I really could have benefited a lot more from that kind of ego boost. (Or 15 years ago. Or ten.)
Much more trivially, listen, for the longest time I have been using Neutrogena's Pore Minimizing toner because I do in fact have giant pores, particularly on my nose and its side slopes into my cheeks, but it's getting hard to find the stuff, which is annoying. Meanwhile this winter I've had a couple of mysterious and disappointing breakouts - extra mysterious because my skin had been feeling really dry except for the sudden giant flare-up. The worst of these happened when I came back from Minneapolis, where of course there was no moisture in the air anywhere (plus I was spending most of my time in a giant refrigerator - that is, a curling facility - which to be fair was probably warmer than the outdoors, but climate-controlled, is my point, dehumidified to within an inch of its life). Anyway, while trying to find a reliable source of Pore Minimizing toner, I thought what the hell, just to get me through until the next time I can get it, I'll give Neutrogena's Alcohol-Free toner a try - it'll be better than nothing.
Friends, it is like night and day. My skin feels smoother and tighter (but in a good way) than it's felt in years. From one morning to the next I don't feel like my face is caked with crumbly buildup. I'm sure what happened was that some time in the past ~forever~ I crossed over from a young person for whom the Pore Minimizing toner was appropriate to a middle-aged person for whom the Alcohol-Free was a better choice (read: yo I turned 40), but I didn't notice that when it happened - only now I'm using this different stuff and it's like almost life-changing. It's giving me a new lease on my face, in any event. Highly recommend. And for a bonus, it's easily available and I won't have to scour high and low for it. (So now they'll probably discontinue it or change the formula or something. But I can enjoy it while it lasts.)
Last night I woke up around 1:45 for no apparent reason, but went easily back to sleep - and then I woke up about half an hour before the alarm went off, from a dream I instantly couldn't remember, feeling sad. I don't know if the dream made me sad? But I was definitely feeling an unhappy gloom for no reason I could identify. Is that what being depressed feels like? (I'm really asking.) Himself was very sympathetic but of course there wasn't much he could do about it. What I wanted to do was call in sick and go back to bed, but of course (?) I couldn't do that. Or at any rate I didn't. I'm here at work now, and we're grilling for dinner tonight despite the fact that it is snowing, and hopefully by then my mood will be cheerier.
I thought I had another thought, but I can't remember it now. Maybe it was to complain about work. Meh. Fill in your work complaints here. I'm sure we're all frustrated with our jobs in one way or another.
♥
My mom is doing a lot better. The confusion she had three weeks ago seems to have been almost if not totally entirely due to the anesthesia working its way out of her system. My brother was there two weeks ago to get her moved out of the temporary convalescent place and make the arrangement to get her into the continuum-of-care place she'd chosen, and she moved into a "respite" apartment there in the middle of last week for a period of (I think) 30 days while she continues to recover from her surgery, acclimates to the new surroundings, etc., and then they'll reassess and presumably/hopefully agree to move her into an independent-living apartment where she won't be quite so hovered-over. :-P But her cognitive stuff is orders of magnitude better than it was in the few days following her surgery and frankly quite a lot better than it was the last few days before her surgery, so there's a chance we were right that getting her skull reattached will be good for her brain and I'm feeling a lot better about that in general.
Himself and I went to a friend's wedding last month, during which reception the bride came over to our table (as brides do) and said to me, very earnestly, something like "I know it's just my own paranoia, but I'm always afraid I've done something to disappoint you, and ever since Himself introduced you to us I've just thought oh my god she is so cool and I just want her to like me, what if she doesn't like me?" I ... admit I was totally baffled and asked her if she'd been drinking. (I was being serious. She said "Oh, clearly," which I took at face value until she reminded me that she doesn't drink, so she was being serious and sober with all this Fox-is-so-cool-I-badly-need-her-to-like-me stuff.) I mean. What do you say when a person who is way, way cooler and better-looking than you are says such a thing at her own wedding? I don't actually remember what I did say, but eventually off she went to another table, and another guest at our table said something about what all that shows about Bride's character, and I said of course it's very nice of Bride to say all that stuff to me - I'm flattered and undeserving at best, and the guest said see and she thought that there showed something about my character. The whole business was very left-field and discomfiting,
and I mention it because yesterday at work my boss (who is an old friend from college) showed me a picture on his phone of himself with someone I knew casually in college but haven't seen or heard from since, and I said Oh, nice picture, and he said "And he remembers you very fondly and favorably as being someone he totally admired and thought was a complete badass." Oh my god you still know Fox, this dude seems to have said to my old-friend-who-is-now-also-my-boss. Put me back in touch with her, he seems to have said. ("We're friends on Facebook," bossfriend said, "so you can find her yourself easily.")
So - twice in four weeks, people much cooler than myself have raved at or about me in ways that I have no real choice but to believe have been sincere? And I don't know what to do with that. Probably nothing, really, except go on about my life as normal, but maybe also wonder a little bit where the hell they were 25 years ago when I really could have benefited a lot more from that kind of ego boost. (Or 15 years ago. Or ten.)
Much more trivially, listen, for the longest time I have been using Neutrogena's Pore Minimizing toner because I do in fact have giant pores, particularly on my nose and its side slopes into my cheeks, but it's getting hard to find the stuff, which is annoying. Meanwhile this winter I've had a couple of mysterious and disappointing breakouts - extra mysterious because my skin had been feeling really dry except for the sudden giant flare-up. The worst of these happened when I came back from Minneapolis, where of course there was no moisture in the air anywhere (plus I was spending most of my time in a giant refrigerator - that is, a curling facility - which to be fair was probably warmer than the outdoors, but climate-controlled, is my point, dehumidified to within an inch of its life). Anyway, while trying to find a reliable source of Pore Minimizing toner, I thought what the hell, just to get me through until the next time I can get it, I'll give Neutrogena's Alcohol-Free toner a try - it'll be better than nothing.
Friends, it is like night and day. My skin feels smoother and tighter (but in a good way) than it's felt in years. From one morning to the next I don't feel like my face is caked with crumbly buildup. I'm sure what happened was that some time in the past ~forever~ I crossed over from a young person for whom the Pore Minimizing toner was appropriate to a middle-aged person for whom the Alcohol-Free was a better choice (read: yo I turned 40), but I didn't notice that when it happened - only now I'm using this different stuff and it's like almost life-changing. It's giving me a new lease on my face, in any event. Highly recommend. And for a bonus, it's easily available and I won't have to scour high and low for it. (So now they'll probably discontinue it or change the formula or something. But I can enjoy it while it lasts.)
Last night I woke up around 1:45 for no apparent reason, but went easily back to sleep - and then I woke up about half an hour before the alarm went off, from a dream I instantly couldn't remember, feeling sad. I don't know if the dream made me sad? But I was definitely feeling an unhappy gloom for no reason I could identify. Is that what being depressed feels like? (I'm really asking.) Himself was very sympathetic but of course there wasn't much he could do about it. What I wanted to do was call in sick and go back to bed, but of course (?) I couldn't do that. Or at any rate I didn't. I'm here at work now, and we're grilling for dinner tonight despite the fact that it is snowing, and hopefully by then my mood will be cheerier.
I thought I had another thought, but I can't remember it now. Maybe it was to complain about work. Meh. Fill in your work complaints here. I'm sure we're all frustrated with our jobs in one way or another.
♥
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