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feh.
okay, morphology has driven me to tears.
that's never happened before. but, like, holding off this cold has taken a lot more out of me than i realized, maybe? i got to where i was trying to write this essay for tomorrow -- "Explore the limits of paradigm structure" -- and i just couldn't. i've been at this all day, and i've come up with about 700 words. i get the question, and i get the limits of paradigm structure, and i get what's in this book with all the flags where i've flagged things, and i can't articulate any of it.
sent the 700 words to the professor with a note about how i've been as sick as he was and how upset it makes me that i can't make this essay any good and how the more i try the more i cough and hurt myself, which is even more frustrating, which is even less conducive to finally getting the thing written --
i mean, i do know the stuff. so it's not like i'm going to (a) ditch the tutorial or (b) go along and then sit there gormless, either of which would waste his time and be Wrong as well as tacky. it's really no skin off his nose, i expect, if i'm less prepared for my eventual exams and whatnot than he thinks i should be. but i know all this, and i'm frustrated and angry with myself, which makes it worse.
one hopes that crying about it and going to bed will make me feel a little bit better in the morning.
that's never happened before. but, like, holding off this cold has taken a lot more out of me than i realized, maybe? i got to where i was trying to write this essay for tomorrow -- "Explore the limits of paradigm structure" -- and i just couldn't. i've been at this all day, and i've come up with about 700 words. i get the question, and i get the limits of paradigm structure, and i get what's in this book with all the flags where i've flagged things, and i can't articulate any of it.
sent the 700 words to the professor with a note about how i've been as sick as he was and how upset it makes me that i can't make this essay any good and how the more i try the more i cough and hurt myself, which is even more frustrating, which is even less conducive to finally getting the thing written --
i mean, i do know the stuff. so it's not like i'm going to (a) ditch the tutorial or (b) go along and then sit there gormless, either of which would waste his time and be Wrong as well as tacky. it's really no skin off his nose, i expect, if i'm less prepared for my eventual exams and whatnot than he thinks i should be. but i know all this, and i'm frustrated and angry with myself, which makes it worse.
one hopes that crying about it and going to bed will make me feel a little bit better in the morning.
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[fluffles fuzzy little ears in a cuddle]
[smites the living crap out of articulatory block]