resonance

[fox]

i'll tell you something -- i like carolyn hax's "tell me about it" column a lot, because her advice often seems right on to me and her writing style and tone are ones i appreciate.  she doesn't get hung up in a lot of feel-good guff, like ann landers and dear abby and (god help us) ask amy and who knows who else.

but even as a disciple of carolyn, i am occasionally stopped in my tracks by something she says that just strikes me as so true i don't know why i didn't think of it before.  i won't say she's changed my life, but she's sure changed my attitude about some things.  the most recent example was in the middle of july when she said awkwardness passes.  regrets don't., but today, we have this:

Maybe failure needs me as its PR person, because it's near the top of everyone's list of horrors (only death and bad haircuts give it any significant challenge) -- and yet often it's the one thing that lies between you and the happiest place you've ever been.  Kind of like bridge traffic en route to the beach.

I realize this all must sound oppressively chipper to someone stuck in bridge traffic with no perceivable end.  But I think it's important that you not lose sight of the fact that the worst phases of your life are still phases, and there will be an after -- one that is an improvement by definition.

i so want to be carolyn hax when i grow up.

Comments

[the-emu.livejournal.com]

Hm, yes. I've been thinking that way, lately, sort of. I may be confident in many ways, but the moment I'm out of familiar territory I'm awkward to the point of terror.

So I'm trying to embrace the idea that I should do things *because* they're scary, for the scariness, and then they're not so scary. So instead of worrying whether I would look like a freak bald, I realised that even if I did look stupid, I could feel good about taking the chance, and that would last longer than looking stupid, so what did it matter if I looked stupid? And once it didn't matter, not so scary.

And I'm thinking I should apply it to job-hunting. Try to get job interviews because job interviews are scary. Then I can just feel good about facing the fear, and consider actually getting a job to be a possible bonus. Right now I'm quietly wondering whether applying for a job in a call centre (I *hate* phones) might be just what I need.

8^-

[jgesteve.livejournal.com]

It's kinda like the weatherman's perspective on life (high pressure and low pressure system distinctions are purely relative to the air next to them)...

I do like her stuff although I often find it hard to read her because it all ends up sounding the same after awhile. Perhaps it's because I can rarely relate to the items being discussed (being ya know as Elizabethan as I am)