ah, my parents.

the trouble with having my parents in town is that it is exhausting.  when they visit me, they are not seeing me while they are visiting where i am -- they are visiting me, and not independent at all, and it's hard to have time to do anything but sleep in between entertaining them.

going to their house is the opposite; they don't feel the need to spend all their time with us when we're home, but there's so little for me to do now that i don't really know anyone in town anymore, and i wind up exhausted from inactivity.

may have had a breakthrough this evening, though.  talked about coming home for a few days when i'm back stateside in march, and while i know (i said) that they'd always like me to stay longer, especially my dad, i just can't, it's not that i don't love them or i don't want to come home or etc., but come on, man.  my mother said "please, i know exactly what you're talking about -- i can't spend a whole month at my parents' house, can i?"  (we can't even spend a whole week at her parents' house.  and her parents, we agreed, would be divided on the concept -- my grandfather would say all of his kids could move back in if they wanted, he'd love to have them, while my grandmother would not be terribly pleased with that prospect, and wouldn't lie about it.)

my father thought about it and said, "i couldn't have spent a solid month at my parents' house once i was an adult.  but they would have loved to have me there."

the apples, they do not fall so far from the trees.  le sigh.  but, at least we understand each other.