fox

Heard back from the director of my old Oxford choir (the college one, not the B-team one at the cathedral)! I am so pleased to hear from her it's a little surprising even to me how delighted I am - but it has brightened what was already a very good day. I'm about two minutes from clapping my hands and twirling.

I had a thought here about where that puts me on the introvert~extrovert scale, but it's escaped me and I'm off to look into some shelving options for my pantry and re-sign my lease. [claps hands][twirls] Hope all of you have a good afternoon -- wouldn't it be something if good moods were infectious instead of the flu? I'm just saying.

Two weddings in one day:  I don't recommend this.

Alarm Saturday 5am.  Long shower, because shaving.  Blow dry (I never do this!) so I can set hair on wordplay's hot rollers.  Spritzer (I never use this).  Then put the coffee on.  Then makeup (I seldom wear this), but not lipstick yet, because coffee, breakfast, etc.  And then finish packing.  Then the rollers are cool, so I take them out, more spritzer, fuss for a while, end up with it half back in a clip.  Breakfast, then lipstick, then coffee -- the rest of the coffee in a travel mug and off I go.

It is now 9:30.

At the church for the singing wedding 10am approx.  Warm up, get our picture taken, sing nice.  I duck out a side door 11:30ish and get to the airport to check in for my flight to NC for Son of a Preacher Man's wedding.  Fly, land, rent a car, find hotel.  Curls have collapsed; massive curling iron touch-up.  More spritzer.  Comb out so what I've got is a wave with curled ends.  Change -- one pair of 3" heels for another, and into my fabulous dress.  More makeup.  Into the car, drive to the place.  Half an hour.  Ceremony at 5:30 -- lovely.  I knew nobody except the bride & groom.  Met some nice folks @ reception.  Left a little after 10pm.  Back at hotel, get as much sorted as possible.  In bed at midnight.

Woke up this morning from a dream where we'd switched to Daylight Savings so I'd missed breakfast and there was no coffee.  There was some other stuff about curling irons and foam rollers and bridesmaids' dresses, but I don't remember it all.  Fortunately, I was wrong, so, breakfast, and now [i.e. this morning when I was writing this] I'm hanging out with the TV, then will shower & check out & return the car & go home.

I managed to get switched to a different flight home -- had to go through Philadelphia intead of going nonstop, but I got home ten minutes after the original flight was scheduled to take off.  Exhausted, and I don't know if this would be any better if both weddings were in the same city.  I think the only way to do two weddings in under 24 hours is if they're on different calendar days -- morning and evening on Saturday are no good, but evening Saturday and morning Sunday might be all right.  GAH.

Also:  things that suck -- zits that grow under makeup, of which you are unaware until you have washed your face.  On the other hand, I suppose it's good that they don't break through.  (I have never been happier to scrub my face than I was last night, y'all.  And I'm still going to be digging mascara out of the corners of my eyes for days.)  Things that rock -- having lost enough weight to be able to wrap a hotel towel around self & leave it there.  Woo!

Urgh, I could give a detailed account of my weekend, but who needs that.  Here is the abbreviated version:

Thursday
Left office 2pm.  At airport in plenty of time for leisurely check-in and actual meal before boarding.  Board on time.  Sit at gate for 4+ hours.  Miss not only own connection but all subsequent connections.  Resign self to spending night in New Jersey (if flight ever takes off at all).  Fortunately able to speak to parents before they board London-bound plane in Newark, and get them to do my Friday errands for me.  Do eventually get to NJ, meet up with brother and sister-in-law -- also delayed, originally rescheduled on same flight following day, which wouldn't get them to London until Saturday morning, but through much perseverence and insisting that someone in DC had given me what they were asking for ("We can't do that, sir -- it's just not possible." "But I don't understand why you keep saying that, because it is possible, or they couldn't have done it for my sister." repeat ad lib./inf./naus.), managed to get onto Friday morning flight reaching London Friday night -- have some dinner at like midnight, grab four hours of sleep.  None of us has luggage, by the way, because it was checked through to London and thus not tagged for release to us at Newark, and it's too late at night for anyone to be able to go get it for us.

Friday
Get to airport soon after 6am.  Check in, track down luggage, adore people who put it in our hands so we can be sure it gets checked in for real, fly to London.  Meet parents.  Get to hotel.  Go to sleep.

Saturday (two years to the day, incidentally, since I left the US in the first place)
Breakfast.  Bus to Oxford.  Couple of errands, but no chance of meeting people I'd intended to see (sorry, foulds! :-().  Lunch.  College, sign register, pictures pictures pictures, ceremony.  Turns out that receiving degrees at that ceremony were about a dozen people taking the D.Phil., a whole bunch taking the M.Sc., a small army taking the BA, four taking the M.St., and me, the only person in the room taking the M.Phil.  This is relevant because all candidates for the same degree are called up at the same time to supplicate and so on, so it's normally x students and the relevant deans, and then for the second bit x students led in by one bedel.  In my case, x=1.  Quite literally sui generis.  It was petrifying for 30 seconds approx. and then kind of cool.  Dinner.  Bus back to London.  Sleep.

Sunday (two years to the day since I originally arrived in Oxford)
Breakfast.  Airport.  Flight to Newark.  Flight to DC, on which (see above) I never got my peanuts.  Home.  V. tired.


Bought some books in the airport; I read Everyone Worth Knowing, the second novel from the girl who wrote The Devil Wears Prada, and it was v. similar; a little less autobiographical, and it felt like it, which I appreciated, but still kind of self-consciously stuck in a particular time.  But the characters were more like characters and less like caricatures, so.  Also picked up Prep, by Curtis Sittenfeld.  The writing isn't bad, although some of the editing is kind of doubtful -- there are places where she has exposition of things that were major plot points fifty pages earlier, as though she'd moved things around from one draft to the next and not kept up with her deleting, or originally written the novel as a series of short stories and not knit them together as thoroughly as she should -- but what's really got me is a couple of things.  One, there are places where the protagonist's first-person narrative sounds so much like ellen_fremedon (in content, I mean, not in tone) that it's really all the way to startling.  And two, here's a place where the heroine is fighting with her father, and I think we're supposed to see that he's right and the boarding school has changed her in negative ways and she's wrong to be embarrassed by him; and while I don't find her and the boarding-school setting completely sympathetic, I don't agree that the father is right, and in fact I was right with her on being embarrassed by him, because there are situations in which some things are Not Done, aren't there?  I didn't go to boarding school, but I did go to private school, and I have a hard time being sorry that I feel like there are different ways to comport ourselves in different surroundings.  I do agree that the protagonist doesn't handle her embarrassment with her father as she should; but I don't agree that she's wrong to feel it in the first place.  And similarly, he's not precisely wrong to be unhappy with her, but he also handles it very, very badly.  It's a conflict that occurs at the midpoint, both of the girl's education and of the book itself, so I suppose it's right that I should feel conflicted about it.  It's just that I'm not accustomed to being so immediately affected by things I read -- I usually read from more of a distance, I think -- especially things that are more or less fluff pieces.  (It's not a bubble-gum novel, but it's not going to win the Pulitzer, know what I mean?)

And then I'm thinking other things, like, it really bothers me that the word consistency means both the degree of firmness or viscosity of a thing and the quality of being consistent.  Drives me nuts.  :-)  There was something else that bugged me, too, but I don't remember what it is at the moment.

E-mail waiting for me when I return to my computer after dinner just now:

Subject:  Inappropriate use of my personal e-mail address
From:  [a student in my college whom I've never heard of]
Date:  5:58 pm
To:  [me]

I am extremely angry to have my college email address abused and have complained to the Master.  My college email is not to be used for sending unsolicited political propaganda under the guise of a 'social' message from the common room mailing list.  I did not want to receive this political invective - in no way does the content of the said email relate to my membership of St Cross, my studies at the university nor my social life as a member of the college or university.  A proper mailing list for political persuasion would be a relevant society of the university.  I have asked the Master to look into this incident and have asked for assurance that I shall not be subjected to such communications in the future.

[signed]

----- Forwarded message from [another student whose name I don't recognize] -----

From:  [aswnIdr]
To:  collegename_social@maillist.etc.
Subject: [CollegeName_Social] Important!
Date: Mon, 24 Jul 2006 19:33:05 +0100

Please take a moment of your time to check this website that depicts what is really happening in Lebanon; something that you will not see on CNN or any other foreign channels.

> > [link redacted] (copy and paste it if you need to)

I must warn you there are some pretty strong pictures, so refrain yourselves from watching the video if you are too sensitive.

The following is a message from a friend of mine in Lebanon explaining to me what is going on (an insider's view),  "did u know that they're throwing phosphate on some villages. that not only causes breathe difficulties, but also burns people! did u also know that the israeli military is having kids write on the missiles  "to the children of lebanon" can u believe that! the goverment even has pamphlets in the country saying "donate 1 dollar to kill an Arab!"

Thank you for your time,
[aswnIdr]

---------------------------------------------------------------------
If you have any questions or comments, please email [Son of a Preacher Man]

To unsubscribe, e-mail: [address]
For additional commands, e-mail: [address]

----- End of forwarded message from [another student whose name I don't recognize] -----

-- [sig file from the first person]

Sigh.

Well, I mean, what could I do?  As it happens, I also find the forwarded message inappropriate for a college mailing list -- but the thing is, the risk of getting loads of that sort of message is prominent among the reasons I was never on the social mailing list, even during my term as president.  It is not, as my correspondent seethes, 'the common room mailing list'.  The social list is an unmoderated, optional-membership list for chatter and discussion.  The common room mailing list is a mandatory-membership list to which only a few people can post -- the Bursar and some related college staff and a few (but not all) student committee members.  Had someone sent me the above message about Lebanon for distribution on the common room mailing list, I would not have posted it.

And in any event, I'm not the student president, so the relevance to me of the angry person's having complained to the Master is unclear.  Nevertheless, I replied, quite calmly, I thought:

Subject: Re: Inappropriate use of my personal e-mail address
From: [me]
Date: 7:54 pm
To: [a student in my college whom I've never heard of], [Master], [B from Downstairs], [Son of a Preacher Man], [new student president]

Hi asimcwInho --

I'm sorry to hear about this.  I'm not at [college] any more at all, and wasn't a member of the social mailing list when I was, but I expect what you'll find from the Master and others is that the social list is not an official [college] list and you are therefore free to opt out of it at any time -- or to register your complaint with its maintainers, which I believe are still [Son of a Preacher Man] ([e-mail address]) and [B from Downstairs] ([e-mail address]).  (I may be mistaken about [SoaPM] and [BfD]; they may have passed control of that list on to the current social secretaries -- like I said, I've never been a member of the social list, so I'm not sure about that.)  My understanding is that all members of the social list have posting access and the thing is unregulated (which is among the reasons I never joined it) -- it is not at all the same as the junior members' mailing list, access to which is controlled and on which the message you quote would certainly never have been posted.

I've cc'd the Master and [SoaPM] and [BfD] on this, and also [New Student President], who took over from me as student president on 1 July of this year.  Hope this message has been helpful.

regards
[me]

One hopes this will also inspire B from Downstairs to update the blasted website to reflect that I am no longer The One Who Takes Your Complaints.  [wry smile]

Gave a speech tonight at Going Down Dinner (yes, that is in fact really what it's called; yes, my speech made a joke -- obliquely -- of it).  Everyone was very complimentary about it; the Master liked it a lot (one can tell the difference between positive reactions comme il faut and positive reactions that are genuinely enthusiastic), and the Development Exec specifically said she thought it was better than Queen P's speech last year (from which I cribbed heavily [g]).  This was my second-last official act as student president, but the last will be going to Executive Committee tomorrow, at which I predict I will contribute nothing, and then someone will point out that it's my last meeting, and the committee's thanks to me will be entered in the record, and I'll thank them, and then I'll leave.  And that will be that!  I'll go buy some packing tape, at that point.

I'll still be president until 23:59 on Friday, but there won't be anything else presidential I'll have to do.  Hallefreakinlujah.

Dear OUSU.

It was unsurprising, but nevertheless disappointing, to receive a letter on the subject of Freshers' Fair from you on Wednesday of this week asking for a decision and the return of the enclosed form by Friday. In fact it arrived in college on Tuesday, but as you had for some unknown reason addressed it to the college secretary instead of to me, the MCR president, it didn't reach me until the next day. Fortunately, the last line of your letter included both an e-mail address and a telephone number where a person should, you said, not hesitate to contact you if she had queries she wished to discuss in advance of returning the form.

The thing is, when you get such queries, you need to ANSWER THEM. I wrote you an actually very pleasant e-mail on Wednesday as soon as I received your letter, explaining a) the timing and addressing issues I mentioned above and b) a couple of reasons why we might not be able to return the form by Friday as you asked. Not having heard from you all day Thursday or Friday (the deadline day!), I called the office number -- where the young man who answered the phone told me all the forms were received yesterday and were being processed, and I should have the response early next week. 'Well, no', I said, 'you didn't receive my form, because you still haven't answered my questions.' He was professional enough to take my number, but I have no -- repeat, ZERO -- confidence that I'll actually hear from you today or at any time this weekend, which means two things: first, I'll have to chase you up again on Monday; and second, my incoming freshers are once again going to get screwed with regard to Freshers' Fair tickets.

And it will be your fault. Congratulations on your continued efforts to persuade us to reaffiliate.

best regards,
a member of the Rebel Alliance

a bunch of us:  [Blah blah, Harry Potter filmed here, annoying when the tourists come, but seeing the movies can renew the Oxford love, etc.]
one guy:  Only, no wand.
another guy:  [Yes, and something else about not having magic.]
self:  And a really disappointing lack of Alan Rickman.
the other woman in the group:  Yes.  What's up with that?
men:  Hang on, I don't -- because this is Professor Snape, right?  What is it that women see in him?
self, the other woman in the group:  [boggle]
then, in unison:  The voice!

I have nothing on my calendar for tomorrow.  When was the last time that happened?

... okay, it was last Monday.  But, in a week like this one, it is of the Yay.  I suspect it's because it's the Friday, though.  Because like I said, nothing on the calendar last Monday, and last week was nine times more hellish than this week, in terms of running me off my feet.  If it had been that way Monday through Thursday and then with nothing on Friday, I'd have been happier about that unscheduled Friday than I am about this one now.

(In other news, three hours and four minutes until the polls close and my student association has a new president-elect!  And then -- what's today -- three weeks until I become an ex-president!  I can hardly wait.)

This means a number of things:

• ( closing date for applications )
  
  
  
• ( closing date for nominations )
  
  
  
• ( my exams provisionally begin on 15 june )
  
  
  
• ( It's half-term at the cathedral school )
  
  
  
• ( I've been coughing unpleasantly much. )
  
  
  
• ( In short: )
  
  
  
• ( Oh, that reminds me: )
  
  
  
• ( But on the up side )

Scene:  the front entry of a very small College.  I have just come from the mailroom behind the lodge back into what we will generously call the foyer, and another member of my college is coming in out of the rain.

her:  Oh, hi, Fox.  How are you.
me:  Oh ... you know.  Um.
her:  [begins to look concerned]
me:  Finals.  Coming up.  So I'm in a bit of a state.
her:  I always* admire how stable you are.  You do so much.
me:  Seriously?
her:  Yes.
me:  Huh.  Well -- fooled you!

I've run across a couple of things I once said I'd post about and haven't yet.  When I've put some dinner on, maybe I'll get to it.

*keep in mind that this woman is new this year and doing her degree part-time; she's in very infrequently from London.  so we barely know each other well enough to be described as friendly acquaintances -- thus her 'always' impression doesn't cover an awful lot of the time.  :-)

The priests and congregation of the church with which my college shares a building are wandering around the quad singing hymns.  I wasn't aware it was Smells and Bells today -- anyone know what the occasion is?

I bet it was their fault the fire alarm went off ten minutes ago, too.

So we've had some issues, here in college lately, concerning student employees.  The committee (of which, remember, I am president) submitted a report to Governing Body this week, but we didn't get it there on time, so the Master suggested deferring it to the next Executive Committee meeting (which is in two weeks).  Meantime, it landed on the Bursar's desk, and since she and the Assistant Bursar are the ones in charge of all the student employees, they took it as a personal attack (which it wasn't), and Son of a Preacher Man got cornered this afternoon and had to talk to them about it for an hour.  He and I talked about it for another hour or so this evening, and GAH, I am so frustrated and upset with this whole thing that I cried about it.  (I do cry -- but usually not about professional-type things.)  Rar, rar.

It's best not to mess with a Taurus who knows she's right.

( in the mailbox today: )

This woman has, through her incompetence, caused people to miss deadlines for reapplying for visas, and to be removed from the registers at the NHS, among other things.  I cannot understand why she hasn't been fired without a reference, except that the Bursar thinks she'd sue and defending the decision would be more than College could afford.  Everyone else is confident College would win such a suit, and thus not be responsible for any of the costs involved ... and yet the secretary remains.  One can only hope she'll retire soon [refrains from expressing less charitable thoughts].