(no subject)

Sent an e-mail to the bursar, my supervisor, and the senior tutor, saying this is what's happened, I don't obviously know how it works, but I'd like to be with my family on Saturday and also have the opportunity to take my exams when, you know, my grandfather hasn't just died, and I don't know which of you I should be asking to meet as early as possible Tuesday morning, but.  Senior Tutor got back to me within half an hour to say of course things can be rescheduled, there's a form you'll need me to countersign.

Will still meet with people tomorrow, I expect.

they don't make anything easy

... but I suppose it's not as difficult as it could be.

If I withdraw from my exams this week, my next chance to take them will not be earlier than September.  This does not strike me as a solution.  Especially given that this Saturday is not the funeral, but rather a brief (they're talking like ten minutes, tops) interment of ashes, to which my mother and her brother and sisters (and presumably their mother) are going, but not my father, my brother, either of my cousins (one of whom lives maybe twenty minutes away), their father, etc., it seems excessive to everyone for me to come all the way home and disrupt so much for it.

So, not withdrawing from my exams.  But still:  urgh.  Bad week for them.  Badness.  So, off goes a note from college to the Proctors saying Please alert the examiners to the mitigating circumstances facing this student, and have them take this into consideration when they're marking.

Best possible outcome?  We'll see.


I do fine with keeping it together, as long as I don't have to talk about it.

irony

I don't mind crying.  It can be very beneficial, emotionally and even physically, to have a good cry and get it out (of one's mind and one's sinuses).

But I hate crying in front of people.  Hate it.  And, perversely, if I'm already upset and then there are people around witnessing me lose my composure, that just upsets me more.  So now I'm in tears from whatever is bothering me and from frustration and anger that people are seeing me lose control.

Argh.